First, let me say this. Yes, it’s a funny name, but so was Wii. “Would you like to come over to my house and play with my Wii?” Beavis and Butt-Head are terribly entertained to this day, but the rest of us got over it. It’ll pass.

Okay, now on to the heart of the matter. I think the iPad is a really really neat device, and I think I want one. I’m not entirely sold, for three reasons.

Tertius: No Flash support. I would like Flash support, even though I know HTML5 is a better way to do streaming video and the main use of Flash right now is for banner ads that AdBlock and AdThwart can’t filter out. There is some cool Flash stuff out there, like Homestarrunner.com, that I want to be able to experience. This is not a dealbreaker, though.

Secundus: No camera. I know there might be one, but I’ll be surprised if it’s in the first model. I think the camera will be in the second iPad. If I’m wrong, then this objection disappears.

Primus: AT&T. Seriously, Apple? With this much time to learn how inadequate AT&T’s network is, you should know better. The fact that you could get an awesome deal on the pricing only has real value if the network actually ****ing works, and far too ***ing often, it doesn’t. It drops calls all the time, delivers crap for bandwidth and is generally craptacular. And you know it. You sold out the existing userbase to get the new users on board, damn you.

If it turns out that there’s an iPad with Flash support, a camera and access to the Verizon network, then I’m in. Well, that or a really cool D&D app. If Wizards of the Coast actually gets their shit together and releases a competent multi-player app that uses the fabled Game Table and incorporates iPad support, then I’ll probably buy 5 of the damned things.